MARINAvsWriting

Is there any way to write something here that isn't going to sound ridiculous?

Tag: New York

Four Jokes and A Funeral

My least favorite time was when two men were performing sexual favors on each other. What they were doing didn’t bother me as much as the fact that they weren’t listening to me. They were in a dark corner at the back of the room, making sure third base was thoroughly satisfied before they’d leave the bar to hit that home run we all so desperately crave.

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A Quarter-Life Crisis

“If you were stranded on an island and could only bring three things what would they be?” I hated playing this game in summer camp. Do your parents count as two things? What kind of outlets does this island have? Do they speak a different language? Will there be boys there? The answers didn’t really matter because I always ended up choosing the same things; my parents, beanie baby collection and stuffed dog, Lucky. Read the rest of this entry »

Dimitry Eugenovich*

“I don’t know, ‘Dimitry’ is not a name you can scream out in the sack,” Leslie said looking up from the email I’d forwarded her. “Okay but how do I look in this dress?” I had 15 minutes to get ready for my first (and hopefully last) blind date. If I’d utilized my roommate’s date-reasoning, I probably would’ve avoided my last two nightmarish relationships. Read the rest of this entry »

Zipper Dee Doo Dah

There comes a time in every strong, independent, single girl’s life when she can’t zip her dress all the way. At this time, she crumbles to the floor in a pile of teary worthlessness and decides it’s time to start dating again. Read the rest of this entry »