In a New York Minute: Morning Commute
by marinashifrin
8:51 a.m – Step out of the apartment.
8:52 a.m. – Pass the man with a small black dog you thought was gay until you saw him kissing his girlfriend goodbye two months ago.
8:53 a.m. – Cross Douglass and 4th avenue.
8:54 a.m. – Car mechanics stare…keep walking.
8:55 a.m. – Pass the homeless man in front of John’s Deli & Grocery and
8:56 a.m. Get your unwarranted morning lewd gesture.
8:55 a.m. – Contemplate saying something, and then remember you saw empty coke cans thrown at him by teenagers a few weeks back.
8:56 a.m. – Pass the man that bleaches his hair blonde and gels it to stand up straight.
8:57 a.m. – Walk faster you should’ve passed blondie three minutes ago.
8:58 a.m. – Red light. Traffic guard, wave, cross.
8:59 a.m – Shoot a dirty look to the car that almost hit you.
9:00 a.m. – Get your first glimpse of the bridge. Have your daily holy-crap-I-really-live-in-New York moment.
9:01 a.m. – Keep walking.
9:02 a.m. – Realize that the next 25 minutes are pretty boring and you don’t need to take note of them for your blog.
9:27 a.m. – Consider calling, but chicken out.
9:28 a.m. Pass Myrtle, Tillary and the Police Station. Turn left onto York and head into DUMBO.
9:29 a.m. Get distracted by the street art. Now you’re five minutes late.
9:30 a.m. Wave to the guy who occasionally takes $2 off your coffee.
9:31 a.m. – Pet Murray and ask Nancy how the business is going.
9:32 a.m. – Let the B62 stop before you sneak around it.
9:33 a.m. – Try and catch a glimpse inside the old auto-body shop painted yellow and turned into a buddhist center.
9:34 a.m. Take your 100th picture of the bridge.
9:35 a.m. Think about writing a post about how sometimes it feels like the walls are talking to you.
9:36 a.m. Turn off NPR and stuff your iPod into your purse.
9:37 a.m. – Spend the next 5 minutes, fiddling for your keys, unlocking the door, holding it open for the guy behind you and climbing two flights of stairs to your office.
9:42 a.m. – Pet Peanuts.
9:43 a.m. – Breathe.
9:44 a.m. – Start the day.
You should have called the unicorn people, Marina. You should have called them. By the way, consider that this makes it slightly easier for people to stalk you. Like me.
PEANUTS!